Have you heard? Of course you've heard. Christmas is under seige by the radical liberals. By removing "Merry Christmas" from the holiday lexicon, liberals have declared war on God, faith, America, heterosexuality, and life itself.Admittedly, this whole "Merry Christmas" ban is out of control. Those who support it are overly sensitive and those who are aggressively opposing it are nuts. Are we to believe that God-With-Us is somehow affected by the policy of Target department stores?
By the way, what is a greeting anyway? Do we offer greetings to declare our socio-political sympathies, or do we offer them as a salve for the wounds of those who struggle through this life? If your "Merry Christmas" is an instrument of cultural warfare, if you are more interested in the content of a greeting than the content of a poor person's cupboard, then I know a place you can stick it. The sun doesn't shine too brightly there, and your "Merry Christmas" will find company with the all the religious cliches that are meant to declare your allegiances without helping anyone much. "I'll pray for you" is there. "God bless you and God bless America" is growing old in the darkness. If you rummage around in there you might find a "Smile, Jesus loves you."
If you want to fight a war on Christmas, why don't you put your efforts into banning this:
This is a photo of my terrified wife sitting in Santa's lap at Heer's department store in 1966. It's a wonder she made it out alive! St. Nick looks like he is about to send Prancer and Vixen to the liquor store for a refill of high octane egg nog.Alcoholic, pedophile Santas should be banned.
(If this particular Santa was played by your grandpa, I'm sorry. It's just...do I really have to explain? The guy looks waxed. Maybe he was the president of the Kiwanis, but he looks like he's got a snootful of MD 20/20.)
Seriously, if you want to strike a blow for Christmas, why don't you declare war on the greed and materialism that is enfolding your family? If you want to fight a war for Christmas, do like the original St. Nick and give away all your riches to serve the poor. If you want to fight a war for Christmas, learn to forgive this December and quit looking for people to blame.
Don't talk to me about wars against language if you can't find the time and resources to give something to the least of these. God is not impressed with your righteous indignation. You may get Sears to reinstate their holy greeting, but the weak will still huddle in the cold while your nephew plays with his new Xbox.
God, forgive us.
Visit us this season with a new sense of hope, and a bountiful dose of grace.
Merry Christmas.
And Happy Holidays.
22 comments:
Ha! On a related note, possibly my favorite bumper sticker I've spotted over the past year said,
"God Bless The Whole World. No Exceptions."
Normally I don't hang my hat on slogans, but that seemed such a perfect skewering of the religious right's conflation of a benevolent God with American primacy.
I have a very similar Santa photo where I am equally terrified.
Man, you beat me to it. I was going to post some similar observations. I guess I'll get around to it eventually.
I can't stand it when people defend materialism more than the faith. Maybe people just put too much faith in materialism.
Or your teenage daughter drives her import while the least of these huddle in the cold. Get over yourself and loose the self-righteous piety.
Ah, yes. Anonymous posters are so bravely snarky.
You're right, oh identity-less one. Reacher's teenager drives an import. An import that rolled off the assembly line before she was born, is unreliable in its mechanical ability, and doesn't have much going for it in the looks department either. Get over your own self and LOSE your own self-righteousness. (LOSE is the word you use for something you wish to be rid of. LOOSE is the word that means the opposite of constricting).
I believe Reacher has repeatedly made it clear, to the literate among us, that every word he writes comes about from searching his own soul. It is our good fortune that he shares his personal demons in such a forum, giving us the opportunity to likewise look within, challenge ourselves, and hold to a higher standard. Does he sometimes come off as pious? Perhaps. But that happens when one speaks with authority and conviction.
Anon,
I easily give more to the poor in two months than my daughter's car cost. Does that make me righteous? No. I struggle every day with the fact that I have heat and food when others don't. It bothers me. I'm weak. But, apparently, I'm doing better than most on that score.
I need to do more. So do you, I suspect.
According to your moral calculus no one could ever speak out against materialism and greed, unless they were destitute and at death's door.
Don't you think the resources we do have should be spent reducing suffering, rather than justifying our excess and fighting culture wars over holiday greetings?
LOOSE THE SELF-RIGHTEOUS PIETY!
The more I think about it, it has a pretty nice ring to it. A little bit like, "Release the hounds!"
What's the word for it? It's not quite a Freudian slip, but... What do you call that?
Loose the dogs! Let's talk about pomposity and hypocrisy! We could even discuss pompous hippopotamouses. Wait. Did I spell that right?
I don't know what all this "loosening hippos stuff is about." I'll leave that to those better trained than I. I will, in the spirit of not using the dreaded ------mas word, wish you all a "Happy Jesus' Birthday!"
Now, I would write more but I just saw this homeless guy with the very top coat that I've been looking for for years. Gotta go Release the hounds!
Cry, Havoc! And let slip the dogs of (culture) war!
I laughed out loud when I heard that Macy's surrendered to the pro-Christmas crowd by promising to reinstate the word Christmas on next year's marketing.
SWEET VICTORY! We Christians almost lost our religious grip on capitalism run amok! We nearly allowed our precious Jesus to flee the glossy pages of bargain-basement opportunism! But no... we wore our lapel pins and wrote our nasty letters and waved our wads of cash in the faces of all the merchant-pawns of the ACLU, as we walked across the street to the local Hobby Lobby. And now we can see so clearly the proud smile on baby Jesus' face. That's what I call the Spirit of Christmas!
Regardless... I almost wonder what a Christmas banned from the world of Playstations and Food Processors and Ugly Neckties might have looked like.
And the word "Christmas" is not "dreaded," it's just presumptive. That's probably a minor irritation, but to some it's an irritation nonetheless, and one that I can understand. Target and other retail outlets is what they is, and what they is is private companies that can choose to do what they want to either cozy up to or alienate their customers. Or risk boycotts and placards int their front lawns. Their choice, and I don't see a problem with it. Government funded nativity scenes are another thing altogether, but then we are getting into a democracy's inherently uneasy relationship with religions of all stripes, since a religion, by definition, is exclusive of all others. You guys can talk all you want about the specifics of how Grace-full or non-dogmatic one can practice a particular religion, and how it is mainly certain fundamentalist elements that alienate certain people (like me), and I've often said as much, but what is not addressed enough around here is that a lot of us feel that a large share of the problem lies within the very idea of religion itself; how that is irreconcilable with harmony and the advancement of civilization...If one religion is right, then the rest are wrong, etc., etc. This is all well worn ground and I'm sure I don't have to cover it here, but I'd be curious as to what some of you think about it.
What the hell? I'm sure in the heat of the moment I had a point A to point B to point C logical progression, but I'm too busy to try to figure out what it exactly was.
Nate...
The irony I was trying to express in my last comment was in this observation:
The "fundies" are the ones notorious (by perception, at least) for alienating people, right? Well, for years Christmas has become more and more a part of the common domain; comfortable and fun for Christians, Atheists, Agnostics, etc. What could be less exclusivistic than that?
So here now the non-fundie crowd actually "makes a break for it"--an attempt to exclude themselves from the real Christmas, and what do the fundies do? They throw a fit! Seemed like the opportunity of a lifetime to exclude those who were blaspheming the birth of Christ had landed in all our laps, and they nailed a stick to it and turned it into a picket sign.
And you think you know somebody...
Isolation happens, but I think it is more of a sign of defeat. Christians tend to isolate themselves when they have finally decided that they can't win a particular culture battle.
The real goal is to create a pervasive Christian culture where everyone goes to church, acts polite, and pays lipservice to the right Biblical metaphors. Until people started to whine, Christmas was THE time of year to be a Christian. An Evangelical Christian could speak the same way in public (God Bless you, etc.) as they do in church without an eyebrow being raised.
This isn't to say that the same people don't really want people saved and to know God. They are just under the false impression that living in a superficial Christian environment makes it easier to accept the gospel. I once heard a friend give it a name. He called it "redeeming the culture." I think most of it is unbiblical baloney.
Redeeming the culture. Hmm...
Yes! Let's redeem the culture!
But what is culture? Culture is people. Culture is the way people talk, act and think.
So let's redeem people!
How do we redeem people?
We don't. God does it. Granted, He often does it through us.
Can you imagine anything phonier than a "redeemed culture" with very few "redeemed people" in it?
Merry Christmas. Welcome to the 1950s.
I had a great comment typed out and it was lost. Ah the frustration of technology. Instead of trying to recreate it, I will just direct you all to this amusing tale:
Activist Judge Cancels Christmas
December 14, 2005 | Issue 41•50
WASHINGTON, DC—In a sudden and unexpected blow to the Americans working to protect the holiday, liberal U.S. 9th Circuit Court of Appeals Judge Stephen Reinhardt ruled the private celebration of Christmas unconstitutional Monday.
"In accordance with my activist agenda to secularize the nation, this court finds Christmas to be unlawful," Judge Reinhardt said. "The celebration of the birth of the philosopher Jesus—be it in the form of gift-giving, the singing of carols, fanciful decorations, or general good cheer and warm feelings amongst families—is in violation of the First Amendment principles upon which this great nation was founded."
In addition to forbidding the celebration of Christmas in any form, Judge Reinhardt has made it illegal to say "Merry Christmas." Instead, he has ruled that Americans must say "Happy Holidays" or "Vacaciones Felices" if they wish to extend good tidings.
Within an hour of the judge's verdict, National Guard troops were mobilized to enforce the controversial ruling.
"Sorry, kids, no Christmas this year," Beloit, WI mall Santa Gene Ernot said as he was led away from his Santa's Village in leg irons. "Write to your congressman to put a stop to these liberal activist judges. It's up to you to save Christmas! Ho ho ho!"
Said Pvt. Stanley Cope, who tasered Ernot for his outburst: "We're fighting an unpopular war on Christmas, but what can we do? The military has no choice but to take orders from a lone activist judge."
Across America, the decision of the all-powerful liberal courts was met with shock and disappointment, as American families quietly took down their holiday decorations and canceled their plans to gather and make merry.
"They've been chipping away at Christmas rights for decades," Fox News personality John Gibson said. "Even before this ruling, you couldn't hear a Christmas song on the radio or in a department store. I hate to say it, America, but I told you so."
Gibson then went into hiding, vowing to be a vital part of the Christmas resistance that would eventually triumph and bring Christmas back to the United States and its retail stores.
The ban is not limited to the retail sector. In support of Reinhardt's ruling, Sen. Ted Kennedy, a Jew, introduced legislation that would mandate the registration of every Christian in the United States and subject their houses to random searches to ensure they are not celebrating Christmas.
"Getting rid of every wreath or nativity scene is not enough," Kennedy said. "In order to ensure that Americans of every belief feel comfortable in any home or business, we must eliminate all traces of this offensive holiday. My yellow belly quakes with fear at the thought of offending any foreigners, atheists, or child molesters."
America's children are bearing the brunt of Reinhardt's marginal, activist rulings.
"Why did the bad man take away Christmas?" 5-year-old Danny Dover said. "I made a card for my mommy out of paper and glue, and now I can't give it to her."
Shortly after Dover issued his statement, police kicked down his door, removed his holiday tree, confiscated his presents, and crushed his homemade card underfoot.
A broad, bipartisan coalition of lawmakers has been working closely with the White House, banding together in the hope of somehow overruling the decision. So far, however, their efforts have been fruitless.
"Our hearts go out to the Americans this ruling affects," Sen. Chip Pickering (R-MS) said. "If it's any condolence, I wish you all a Happy Holidays, which, I'm afraid, is all I'm legally allowed to say at this time."
Hello again,
I've been out on blog sabbatical for some time, but have decided that this would be an opportune time to check back in with the reachers.
I find myself in a peculiar place in this whole debate, as i'm far from "both sides" of it. I'm not undecided on the topic, and certainly not apathetic towards it. I am rather passionate in my convictions regarding the subject, actually.
I find it ironic that both Right and Left seem to be swinging at nothing but air. I adamantly wish to help keep Christmas sacred, with its original meaning and purpose. However, i am not the least bit threatened or even annoyed that the government or the public sector wishes to be politically correct regarding this matter. The fact is, "Happy Holidays" is the only way to wish "everyone" the best during this season. There are at least a half a dozen holidays celebrated during this part of the year.
But that still isn't the point. The point is, Christmas is a Christian holiday. Christmas is the celebration of the greatest gift of all time--Jesus Christ, the savior of the world. I share Reacher's sentiments regarding the cultural "takeover" of Christmas by consumer industry and media.
In other words, my problem is not with secular society's exclusion of the celebration of Christmas. Rather, i am disgusted by the fact that CHRISTIANS have abandoned Christmas for the most out of control consumerist holiday of the year. Sure, most do it "in the name of love" for their own loved ones. But i am much more attracted to a Christmas where we as families, Sunday school classes, Bible study groups, and churches join together to help those who are in need, as good ole' St. Nick did.
But even as we intermingle St. Nicholas with Christmas, let's be reminded that Jesus Christ himself is the only one worthy of worship and focus during this season. Anything or anyone who takes the spotlight off Jesus becomes an idol, and anyone turning their focus towards it/them becomes an idolator.
Now, if someone wants to celebrate Hannukah, wonderful (By the way, how'd they manage to keep the materialistic muck out of their holiday? Maybe we could learn something from the Jews!). If someone wants to celebrate Kwanza, may their holiday be joyous. If they want to celebrate St. Nicholas' Day, fantastic! But thus far, the only one threatening my freedom to celebrate Christmas are those who pressure me to buy into (no pun intended) the consumeristic holiday that "Christmas" has become.
And just think how pissed all the "Happy Holiday" crowd will be when they discover that the root of the word "holiday" is, in fact, "holy day." Damn it all!
Good to know that the scripture, "They will know you by your parsing linguistics or, in a pinch, your utter and absolute missing of the point" is still alive and well. Like c_neil, this was to be the subject of my next blog. Hmmmm. What to do, what to do. Canceling church because Christmas, er, the happy holiday falls on a Sunday always works in a pinch. Back to the digital drawing board...
There is no war on Christmas. There are some who think government should not give an endorsement, no matter how tacit, of any particular faith, going even so far as to want to remove Christmas trees from government property. They constitute a minority. Then there are those completely miserable assholes who hate the mere existence of religion so much that they feel compelled to spew bile when you wish them a Merry Christmas. They constitute a very small minority of that minority -- I can count on one hand the number I've encountered after nearly fifteen years of working retail.
Beyond that, there's Bill O'Reilly and his ilk, who are in the business of selling manufactured outrage. So they make shit up, and exaggerate everything else. They do this to make money and get soundbites of their show splashed all over cable TV like so much diarrhea. They can't look like champions of the masses unless they have an enemy, after all. And for the most part, we play along.
That's how people like O'Reilly and Ann Coulter and Michael Moore have careers. This is such a non-issue that it makes me weep openly for the days when TV journalists did something resembling actual journalism
Amen to that.
Here's a reminder that the "war on Christmas" (God help us when we use such weighty words so lightly) is ages old: http://www.slate.com/id/2132387/?nav=fo
As Christians, why can't we see that Happy Holidays might be a respectful way to show respect for those who believe other than we do? Instead Merry Christmas has to become a weapon with which to slay the sinner. Geez.
And silly me, I always thought the "happy holidays" thing was not so much sensitivity toward whoever you were wishing them for (where I grew up, MAYBE one person in 200 or so, if not less, didn't celebrate Christmas, so it's just not something I gave much thought to)as the fact that the season kind of starts with Thanksgiving and ends with New Year's. So, you know, three birds with one greeting, so to speak. Oddly, Bill O'Reilly never asked for my thoughts on the matter.
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